Dan Savage

Dan Savage





I’m a 36-year-old married woman who fantasizes about her husband of 10 years being intimate with other women. This isn’t a new thing for me. I’ve fantasized about this for years, but we’ve never acted on it. He is intrigued but afraid that it might somehow damage our relationship. But I’ve done some research on it and it’s something I’m eager to try. (With my husband’s consent, of course!) But in all my research, I’ve found different and sometimes conflicting definitions of what it means to be a “cuckquean.” I’m interested in watching my husband pleasure and be pleasured by another woman in a purely physical way. I’m not interested in being “cheated on.” No flirty texts, no unsanctioned coffee dates. I’ve read accounts of women who are turned on by the humiliation and insecurity of their partner being with others, often women the husband knows “in real life,” either through work or through social life. In my case, I would rather my husband not even know the name of the other woman. And he would only be able to sleep with her with my consent and I would want to be “in control” of the situation. So, what does that make me? Do cuckqueans come in all different proclivities? I feel like the end result is the same—my partner bedding someone else—but my motivation is different than what I’ve seen.

- What The Cuck Am I?



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