Hi everyone,

I have been looking for information on bondage. Specifically, the type with ropes. I have been interested in doing this for a while and my current partner was into the idea of bondage, and we have looked into some ways to do it, but for some reason I find more warnings about unsafe ways that it happens, and what type of rope not to use, and horror stories, and now my girlfriend is starting to get scared about what could possibly happen.

I am hoping that maybe a group with your experience could give me some advice. I really don’t want to injure her, but I would also like to make some of my fantasies come true. Do you have any advice for us?

— Wanna be knotty?

Hello knotty!

We are so happy that you and your girlfriend seem to take safety as a first concern when it comes to kinky play. Please don’t ever lose that because when we delve into the world of things like bondage, breath play, fire play, and impact there really isn’t a way that we can call it safe-play, but it can be done in a safer way.

In the world of kink, rope is one of the most interesting that we have ever come across. Those who participate in this form of bondage form some close friendships and tribes of people. What this means for you is that when you find a group of people that are going to invite you to come learn and experience it, you could also be forming some lasting connections.

Okay, so to answer your question we are going to give you some new words to Google while you are trying to learn more about this beautiful form of erotic experience. First off are Shibari and Kinbaku. In the Western World these are two words that most people know when referring to rope bondage. Shibari means “to tie decoratively” and Kinbaku means “tight binding”. When we are speaking of using this form of knotwork for BDSM and kink there are a couple other terms that you should familiarize yourself with.

A rigger is the one that is tying their partner up. A rope bunny is the partner that is being tied. For Shibari, people typically use a rope that is made from jute or hemp, and not the stretchy type of rope that you would find at an adult toy store. It’s also a good idea to do a lot of practice before you try to do any of the knots that you will hopefully be learning very soon. There are lots of videos that you can find online if you want to get a couple of simple knots worked out. Always make sure to have a pair of medical grade safety scissors with you when playing with rope for quick release.

There are a couple of online resources that can help you such as Shibari Academy. Other names concerning rope that would be good for you to look up are Twisted Monk, Watts the Safeword, and Two Knotty Boys Videos.

Like we stated earlier, one of the best parts about rope play is the community aspect that comes with this skill. For this part we are going to suggest you hit a different part of the internet. Fetlife.com is always a good place to start when you are looking for community. It is a social media website specifically for kinky people, but let us warn you, it is VERY not safe for work. Fetlife.com is sorted by location so you can find people and events near you that will be suited to your liking. We hope that you find a group that will be to your liking and help you find ways to practice this sexy and fun kink.

On a side note from those of us in the group that aren’t into rope bondage. Until you get some skills worked out and your girlfriend is feeling better about being tied up, is there any way you would settle for other types of bondage? There are plenty out there that could help you achieve some of your fantasy while not being as dangerous as suspending someone from the ground.

Some of our favorites are silicon and leather cuffs which are great for that feeling of submission without being such a commitment when it comes to being bound. These can easily be found locally at stores like The Look or The Castle.

The fun thing about bondage is that you don’t need expensive rope or toys in order to achieve the fun you are looking for! Things like sports tape can be used and when you find a brand like the Dura-Tech Vet Flex Bandage Wrap, you get a fun choice of colors. If you don’t mind the pain that can be caused from removal, (we don’t kink shame around here), duct tape is absolutely an option also. Even a normal household item like Saran Wrap can give a yummy mummified feeling for someone that wants to be restrained. Get creative! Just keep that safety attitude around you when you are playing, and you will have a great time. Keep it Kinky King!

The Alaskans wish someone would tie them up long enough so that they could get caught up on sleep. Send them an email at lastfrontierdating@outlook.com if you are interested in helping them achieve that goal, or even if you just have questions about love, sex, relationships, or kink!

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